"Why get myself attached to something/someone when I know it/he is inevitably leaving me one day?"
"If this is how things go then, why do we live when we know we're going to die one day?"
"But that's different!"
"How?"
"I don't know now, I just feel there's something different between these two contexts"
"OK! Why do you deprive yourself from a good thing by your own hands today just because it will leave you by force sometime in the future? Do you know what will happen tomorrow? Do you know what road swifts might happen? Do you know if may be you're ll be the one not wanting it/him anymore so the process of detaching in the future won't be as hard as you imagine?"
"I don't know for sure all these things but what about planning? We should plan for what's right and fitting from the start and then when road swifts happen we stay flexible! What you're saying is chaos"
"What's not chaotic in life?OK! What about enjoying the moment of whatever life brings you and think of nothing further!"
"Yeah, sounds good, or sounds easier on me at the moment, don't fight for what you don't have and don't resist what you have. Stay serene...WAIT but I would be so passive towards my life at that time!"
"SHUT UP"
"I'm watching my mind, watching my mind, watching my mind, what else will you tell my now? I'm not what you think, I'm not what you think, Life is not what you think, people are not what you think....you're shrinking now my mind, I've got the power over you, stay there until I need you, just rest :)"
Monday, November 5, 2012
Thursday, November 1, 2012
Put your HIGH HEELS on! (Intro-I)
I’ve always wondered why high heels
were sexy. Why a very normal woman can turn into a sexy one once just putting
on her high heels? Why high heels are for women only not for men as well
(regardless the fact that many things are categorized for women only beside the
high heels). Why a lady’s attitude, feelings or even confidence can be affected
by the high heels she’s putting on?
This question can have many different
answers. Some would see it physical; in the shape of legs in high heels, or the
moves of the body when walking in high heels, etc. Others might see the psychic
side of it; the balanced steps taken when putting them on, or the statue reflected
and perceived. Fortunately, this is not
what I’m talking about in this book.
Contrary to writers’ passion for
stretching their points of views into the greatest number of words and longest
statements, I would like to make a long list of questions short and ask:
“What’s the secret behind high
heels?”
As my usual research sniffing instinct,
that I can barely fight at many times, I couldn’t hold my hands from googling
“High Heels” and get to know everything about them. You might think I have
plenty of free time to get to the idea of googling “High Heels”, yet, what you
don’t know is that this is only one of a million thoughts that I fight against
googling them. I just have to surrender to one of the thoughts attracting
magnets, pulling me towards any article, book, video or person mentioning their
topic. I started searching about the “High Heels” as if I’m searching to find
any facts about a guy I’m dying to date!
And then, PUFF, I was astonishingly
surprised from the amount of information I found about my desired prey.
First of all, when I facebooked it, I
found hundreds of “High Heels” pages, groups and communities. No wonder that
most of them were really a channel of marketing for high heels products, which
is the normal. On the other hand, the outrageous, was finding a page called
“Networking in high heels”; which the premier women-only networking community striving to
give women at all levels of business the connections, resources, and expertise
that will increase success and boost profitability….any thoughts?
Ok. Another trial, with something less outrageous? “High
on Heels” is a unique collective of outrageously talented female artists
providing tailored event packages around the world. DJs, vocalists, musicians
and performers; High on Heels is the all-female line-up taking the events world
by storm. Established in 2002! Never heard of them, honestly, but they seem
interesting.
Another page’s objective was providing frequent beauty
and health advice for women, that had nothing to do with high heels.
Some pages were not in English or Arabic language, that I
found it hard to understand what they’re purposing and found myself too lost to
think of a way to get to understand this language, as there are definitely ways
for so.
Despite the many many face book pages my search succeeded
to hunt, I was pretty more interested to know about the history of the High
Heels.
It wasn’t of great surprise that all
the history I could read about the high heels indicates that heels in general
and the extent of their height, refer to a certain position or social level of
the person putting them on.
Most of the lower class in ancient Egypt walked barefoot, but figures on murals dating from 3500
B.C. depict an early version of shoes worn mostly by the higher classes. These
were leather pieces held together with lacing that was often arranged to look
like the ankh symbol, which represents life.
There are also some depictions of both
upper-class males and females wearing heels, probably for ceremonial purposes.
Egyptian butchers also wore heels, to
help them walk above the blood of dead beasts.
In ancient Greece and Rome, platform
sandals called ‘Kothorni’, later known as buskins in the Renaissance, were shoes with high wood or cork
soles that were popular particularly among actors who would wear shoes of
different heights to indicate varying
social status or importance of characters. In ancient Rome, the sex trade was
legal, and female prostitutes were readily identified by their high heels.
Regardless of the prostitute thing
just mentioned, but yeah actually, I’ve never seen a prostitute putting on ,for
example, flat shoes or snickers! They’re usually represented by the media, in
high heels, and good luck goes to those who catch one with red high heels.
Except may be for some porn story based movies, as some of my friends revealed.
But anyway, a prostitute needs to be
sexy, and high heels was one of her tools, so that gets us back to our question
of why high heels are sexy?
For me, I see ‘high heels’ sexy as a
way of living as much as a way of dressing, once we look behind the
materialistic side and switch on our mind’s eyes to see the philosophical side.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
'Always' under cover
In Egypt, 'Always' is a word that has two meanings; either "All the time" or the pads used by women during their menstrual cycle. And in an Egyptian Pharmacy, when you hear 'Always' then definitely what's being meant is the one concerned with women only issues.
It all dragged my attention the day I went into the pharmacy to get medicine and found a man that looks in his 30s asking for 'Always'. It wouldn't have been any attention catcher to me except when seeing how he's asking for it. I can assume that out of embarrassment he was turning his voice too low and had no eye contact to anyone in the place including the doctor he's directing his order to. Unfortunately enough for him, he had to repeat the same order again as the doctor couldn't hear him the first time. Fortunately enough for me I was close enough to him to hear him ordering 'Always' twice, when it seems like he would have preferred to get shot killed over ordering 'Always' publicly.
The very first thought crossing my mind was 'How nice of him!" He had to do that for a woman's sake certainly, and had to put him self in such an embarrassing situation (from his point of view) just to rescue a woman, while she might have no clue about the struggle he had to go through to do her something that might seem very simple. But the question is "Why does it have to be any embarrassing after all?"
Same like the idea of lingerie and under wear shops, Durex stands, etc. Even though I might give an excuse to these stuff to be embarrassing in our culture that still suffers to a large extent when the word 'sex' gets any close. Despite the fact that many of those embarrassed ones are sex experts, only, under cover. On the other hand, I can't find an excuse of what's embarrassing regarding the menstrual cycle and whatever is engaged with it. Why can't we say 'Sorry, I'm PMSing' if a man mentions I look tired and asks about what's wrong with me? Why can't we carry the 'Always' we're buying in the normal pharmacy bags instead of those black ones as if I'll either get arrested, harassed, mocked or thought bad of if someone sees 'Always' in my bag. Why can't any man order 'Always' for his wife, sister or daughter normally? Isn't 'Always' another form of Pampers that we get for our children or old ones? Isn't the menstrual cycle just like any other physical change a person might come through?
I'm not asking for breaking down our modesty, instead, I'm asking to stop living in duality. The duality that is present in being modest in what is normal while forgetting about it when it comes to throwing the worst insults in the street publicly for example! I'm asking to stop leading a hypocritical life, a superficial life that's based on what we were raised on and what the social mirrors reflect on us to do and say without any brains given the freedom of thinking on its own and giving each thing its real weight and value. I'm asking for not living 'Always' under covers.
It all dragged my attention the day I went into the pharmacy to get medicine and found a man that looks in his 30s asking for 'Always'. It wouldn't have been any attention catcher to me except when seeing how he's asking for it. I can assume that out of embarrassment he was turning his voice too low and had no eye contact to anyone in the place including the doctor he's directing his order to. Unfortunately enough for him, he had to repeat the same order again as the doctor couldn't hear him the first time. Fortunately enough for me I was close enough to him to hear him ordering 'Always' twice, when it seems like he would have preferred to get shot killed over ordering 'Always' publicly.
The very first thought crossing my mind was 'How nice of him!" He had to do that for a woman's sake certainly, and had to put him self in such an embarrassing situation (from his point of view) just to rescue a woman, while she might have no clue about the struggle he had to go through to do her something that might seem very simple. But the question is "Why does it have to be any embarrassing after all?"
Same like the idea of lingerie and under wear shops, Durex stands, etc. Even though I might give an excuse to these stuff to be embarrassing in our culture that still suffers to a large extent when the word 'sex' gets any close. Despite the fact that many of those embarrassed ones are sex experts, only, under cover. On the other hand, I can't find an excuse of what's embarrassing regarding the menstrual cycle and whatever is engaged with it. Why can't we say 'Sorry, I'm PMSing' if a man mentions I look tired and asks about what's wrong with me? Why can't we carry the 'Always' we're buying in the normal pharmacy bags instead of those black ones as if I'll either get arrested, harassed, mocked or thought bad of if someone sees 'Always' in my bag. Why can't any man order 'Always' for his wife, sister or daughter normally? Isn't 'Always' another form of Pampers that we get for our children or old ones? Isn't the menstrual cycle just like any other physical change a person might come through?
I'm not asking for breaking down our modesty, instead, I'm asking to stop living in duality. The duality that is present in being modest in what is normal while forgetting about it when it comes to throwing the worst insults in the street publicly for example! I'm asking to stop leading a hypocritical life, a superficial life that's based on what we were raised on and what the social mirrors reflect on us to do and say without any brains given the freedom of thinking on its own and giving each thing its real weight and value. I'm asking for not living 'Always' under covers.
Safe Love...Love More, Suffer Less
No one is saved from love's killing poisons. Probably we get stuck with our life, lose interest, fall out of love and into depression, lead a lousy misrable life for some time, until something happens to get us back on track again. May it be another love, a new motive in life, or a dramatic change over. Yet, we all have played the love game unsafely, at least once.
After a heart break and heart ache, people usually resign to the extremists' "Love is weakness" syndrome, others fall into the trap of "I can never love again" , others are pain lovers who keep on loving the same way and getting hurt the same way, some might get arrested by the "love fear" sickness and escape every single potential person, while very few think about "Safe Love".
Just like Safe Sex..you can have the tool, to have sex freely. You can have sex freely, yet you don't have 100% guarantee pregnancy (which is pain in Safe Love) won't take place!
From that point on, here are some seriuos points that will help you love greater and suffer less:
1. Let your mind lead. At the very first phase of any pre-relationship, we are usually hungry for love, jumping to conclusions and to the next steps. Love is not blind, Rush is! Learn how to hold your emotional energy horses to give your mind the space to think.
2. Give your mind the right filteration tool to be able to lead your heart. This needs you to know more about yourself. The first filteration tool is; What's your strengths that you need your partner to maintain and the weaknesses that you need your partner to accept, tolerate and compensate the relationship with? If -for example- you have low self esteem, then why do pressure yourself to be with someone who lowers it even more! Never double your trouble just because you want love and to settle. The second filteration tool is your vision. Knowing your vision, how do you want your life style to be, where are your objectives and ambitions taking you in life, should be an indicator to who can support you going there and not on his/her expense, it's because he/she is going there anyway as well.
3. Define Love. Love is not the passion, rush and butterflies we experience at the begining of any relationship, these are only chemistry and biology that fade away with time (which is the time we think we stopped loving the other person and which is not true). Love is never ending as long as it's ever nurtured. Love is the more understanding of each other that we go through and the more adapting and fitting we feel towards the other. Love is only real when it's accompanied by being married, living in the same house, and having complete sex.That's why it's called "Falling in love, because it takes time, has phases and then you're finally in love with the ultimate intimacy that exist in a relationship;complete sex. And that's why also, sex is not recommended very early in any relationship, it's just unnatural to the "falling in love" concept, it might even kill love very early. What's before all that is passion, attachement, liking, admiration, etc, which is important, but don't mix love with other definitions and make it easier on yourself.
4.Give your heart a breath only after you're 100% convinced. Don't settle for what's less than what you want. If that person can't give you ALL what you need and MOST of what you like then this relationship won't be a good lasting one, which means love's pain at the day you might decide to break up. Compared to the decision of breaking up when it's just a mental process that proved an undesired output."Life is just way too fun to be stuck in some relationship that isn't really all that satisfying" (Better single than sorry, a book by Jen Schefft)
5. During falling in love and being in love, don't forget the above 4 points.
Also, always remember that safe love needs safe communication, and needs two to tango to pass the natural turbulances any love and any relationship is exposed to
After a heart break and heart ache, people usually resign to the extremists' "Love is weakness" syndrome, others fall into the trap of "I can never love again" , others are pain lovers who keep on loving the same way and getting hurt the same way, some might get arrested by the "love fear" sickness and escape every single potential person, while very few think about "Safe Love".
Just like Safe Sex..you can have the tool, to have sex freely. You can have sex freely, yet you don't have 100% guarantee pregnancy (which is pain in Safe Love) won't take place!
From that point on, here are some seriuos points that will help you love greater and suffer less:
1. Let your mind lead. At the very first phase of any pre-relationship, we are usually hungry for love, jumping to conclusions and to the next steps. Love is not blind, Rush is! Learn how to hold your emotional energy horses to give your mind the space to think.
2. Give your mind the right filteration tool to be able to lead your heart. This needs you to know more about yourself. The first filteration tool is; What's your strengths that you need your partner to maintain and the weaknesses that you need your partner to accept, tolerate and compensate the relationship with? If -for example- you have low self esteem, then why do pressure yourself to be with someone who lowers it even more! Never double your trouble just because you want love and to settle. The second filteration tool is your vision. Knowing your vision, how do you want your life style to be, where are your objectives and ambitions taking you in life, should be an indicator to who can support you going there and not on his/her expense, it's because he/she is going there anyway as well.
3. Define Love. Love is not the passion, rush and butterflies we experience at the begining of any relationship, these are only chemistry and biology that fade away with time (which is the time we think we stopped loving the other person and which is not true). Love is never ending as long as it's ever nurtured. Love is the more understanding of each other that we go through and the more adapting and fitting we feel towards the other. Love is only real when it's accompanied by being married, living in the same house, and having complete sex.That's why it's called "Falling in love, because it takes time, has phases and then you're finally in love with the ultimate intimacy that exist in a relationship;complete sex. And that's why also, sex is not recommended very early in any relationship, it's just unnatural to the "falling in love" concept, it might even kill love very early. What's before all that is passion, attachement, liking, admiration, etc, which is important, but don't mix love with other definitions and make it easier on yourself.
4.Give your heart a breath only after you're 100% convinced. Don't settle for what's less than what you want. If that person can't give you ALL what you need and MOST of what you like then this relationship won't be a good lasting one, which means love's pain at the day you might decide to break up. Compared to the decision of breaking up when it's just a mental process that proved an undesired output."Life is just way too fun to be stuck in some relationship that isn't really all that satisfying" (Better single than sorry, a book by Jen Schefft)
5. During falling in love and being in love, don't forget the above 4 points.
Monday, March 19, 2012
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